In a Reddit post, a woman claimed that she publicly confronted a "toxic" guest at her friend's engagement dinner. According to the woman, the guest—under the moniker "N"—used the dinner as an opportunity to announce her pregnancy. The confrontation left N in tears, but the bride-to-be, and hundreds of Redditors, applauded the woman, who provided N with a much-needed lesson in etiquette.
The post, which has received 9,500 votes and 850 comments, was published by u/fuziz in Reddit's popular, "Am I The A**hole" forum. She wanted to know: "AITA for ruining an engagement dinner?"
"My friend [Sarah] invited my boyfriend and I [f] to a dinner where she had announced her engagement with her now-fiancé," she said at the beginning of the post. "There were many of her closest friends there with their significant others.
"Once Sarah announced her engagement everyone was congratulating her and everything. We were stoked and just having a good time," she continued.
That is until N announced that she and her husband were expecting.
She explained in the post that Sarah looked "really upset" as her guests started to congratulate N and her husband on their news. When she asked Sarah if N was allowed to announce her pregnancy, Sarah responded: "No."
In defense of Sarah, the poster decided to confront N in front of the other guests.
"You weren't given permission to announce your pregnancy here. Sarah and her fiancé gathered everyone here and are paying for our meals," she said. "The night is about them...not you.
"If you wanted a pregnancy announcement dinner you should have held it on your own time but you wanted to take the attention from Sarah and her fiancé away so badly that you're ruining their engagement dinner," she continued. "You're toxic."
Though the confrontation left N in tears, some experts would agree that N's announcement was inappropriate.
According to Very Well Family, someone else's "big moment," is not the time or place to announce a pregnancy.
"While it might be great to make your news known at a family gathering where everyone is present, it is key to ensuring that you aren't stealing someone else's thunder," the article read.
"So hold your tongue if someone else has just made a big announcement, like their engagement or their own pregnancy," the article continued. "The same holds true for making the announcement at someone's wedding."
A writer for Love to Know also encouraged guests to "refrain from making non-related announcements at the [engagement] party."
The poster's boyfriend tried to convince her that she'd ruined the dinner, but at the end of the night, Sarah texted the poster to thank her for what she had done. Many Redditors also applauded the poster for defending Sarah.
"NTA [not the a**hole]. I wish you were one of my friends, that's awesome," said u/verminousbow. "Edit: N ruined the dinner. You put her in her place and stood up for Sarah."
"OP [original poster], I love your shiny spine," commented u/PrideofCapetown. "You're a true friend and I'm sorry your BF either can't see or can't appreciate that. You redeemed the night, you didn't ruin it."
"NTA. You stood up for your friend. Your friend thanked you," added u/patjames904. "Your boyfriend seems like the type who does not like to make waves. Fine for him but he doesn't have the right to tell you how to act. People need more friends like you!"
