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By Melissa Fleur Afshar
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The modern dating landscape is saturated with advice on chemistry, compatibility, and the importance of putting a relationship through its sexual paces before marriage. But Bethany Beal, 38, built her relationship on a very different premise.
The Texas-based Christian influencer and mother of three shared her first kiss at the altar, while marrying her husband at 30. What many may view as unusual and extreme, Beal frames as a deeply personal commitment.
She spoke with Newsweek about the teenage promise that shaped her unconventional approach to intimacy, and why her story continues to spark surprise years later.
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"I read a book when I was a teenager about a woman who decided to save her first kiss for marriage. I was inspired," Beal said. "How cool to only ever kiss one man. The man I'd marry."
That inspiration grew into a commitment. At 13, she decided not only to abstain from sex until marriage, but also to reserve her first kiss for her future husband. The decision would require nearly two decades of patience. Yet Beal, who has now been married for eight years and recently welcomed her third child, says that she remains proud of the promise she made as a teenager.
"The waiting did feel long at times, but I am proud of my choice," she said. "Sharing my first kiss ever with my husband at the altar of our wedding is such a sweet memory."
A Different Relationship Path
Beal's story stands out in a culture that often treats intimacy and sex as an essential part of dating. Yet her experience also arrives at a moment when younger Americans are reporting less sexual activity than previous generations, challenging assumptions about what modern relationships look like.
Though Beal's decision was predominantly driven by faith and the example she encountered in a book as a teenager, researchers say delayed sexual experiences are becoming more common for reasons ranging from changing social habits to shifting attitudes about relationships.
According to 2024 data analyzed by the Institute for Family Studies, weekly sexual activity among U.S. adults aged 18 to 64 fell from 55 percent in 1990 to 37 percent in 2024. Researchers have linked part of the decline to reduced social interaction and falling cohabitation rates. Among young adults aged 18 to 29, the share living with a lover dropped from 42 percent in 2014 to 32 percent in 2024.
The trend has become so pronounced that some researchers and commentators have begun referring to it as the "sex recession."
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Data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System found that 47 percent of high school students questioned had ever had sex in 2013. By 2023, that figure had fallen to 32 percent. The percentage declined across all racial and ethnic groups during that period, although rates remained relatively stable between 2021 and 2023.
Meanwhile, a 2020 study published in JAMA Network Open found that 30.9 percent of Generation Z men aged 18 to 24 reported no sexual activity in the previous year. By comparison, 14.1 percent of millennial men aged 25 to 34 reported the same.
While those broader shifts are not necessarily rooted in religious convictions, they have contributed to a growing conversation about intimacy and whether there is any single "correct" timeline for it.
For Beal, however, the choice was never about bucking social trends.
"I grew up in a very conservative family and community," she said. "Many of my friends actually made similar commitments.
"I know it seems very extreme to many people online. But, in my world, it seemed pretty normal."
That difference in perspective may help explain why her story continues to generate fascination whenever it resurfaces on her social media accounts. What appears unconventional to some audiences was, in her view, a familiar value within the community that shaped her upbringing.
"I actually run a very public Christian ministry and chose to share my dating, engagement and marriage very publicly," she said. "I live streamed my wedding and thousands of people were able to celebrate with me in my marriage to my husband."
She continues to discuss the experience, not because she believes others should make the same choice, but because she wants women to feel empowered to make their own decisions.
"There is a lot of pressure to have sex, get experience and test drive the relationship before getting married," she said. "I’m proof that you can still save sex for marriage and have a thriving relationship."
Contact Newsweek editors on this story: Sirena Bergman and Paul Donnelley.
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