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By Daniella Gray
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A mom of two was left outraged by what she saw another mother with her daughter at the beach.
Ashley Cast (@healthybutno) told Newsweek she witnessed "the most insane thing" as she staged a seemingly sweet beach day with her young daughter using tripod. The footage was seen in a clip on TikTok.
Cast, who was at the same beach with her husband and two children, saw something else entirely when the record button turned off.
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"When I first saw them … I thought it was super cute they were matching, and the daughter was helping her mom carry some things," the 32-year-old said.
But the mood quickly shifted when the mom had set her camera up to film the two of them building a sandcastle.
After playing for around 10 seconds, the mom checked the footage and decided she didn't like what the camera had captured and knocked over part of the sandcastle.
"After she knocked over the sandcastle, I felt really bad for the little girl, but I was also mad at the situation," Cast said. "The way the little girl responded was as if this situation has happened before."
Cast added that the most-disturbing part was the sharp contrast between the mother's on-camera persona and her real-life demeanor.
"Every time the camera turned off, the mom would yell or talk sternly to the little girl, telling her exactly how she wanted her to act," Cast said.
"On camera, the mom was happy and excited to be there," Cast continued. "Once the mom was done recording, the mom acted annoyed at her daughter. It was shocking and upsetting their interaction was so different on [and] off camera."
The mother also reportedly promised her daughter they would go swimming after filming but canceled the plan once the footage was captured.
Then Cast had a heartbreaking realization: the beach trip wasn't about memories; it was about making content.
Anat Joseph, a licensed clinical social worker and psychoanalyst based in New York and New Jersey, told Newsweek that Cast's description of what happened is a clear example of performative parenting—when the focus is more on how the parent looks to others than on the child's actual experience.
Joseph said that, if a parent acts for the camera or repeatedly breaks promises like "We're going swimming" for content, the child may develop confusion, disappointment, and mistrust.
"This kind of inconsistent attention—especially when tied to performance—can have lasting effects," Joseph said. "Kids may learn to suppress their own needs to please others, or feel that their worth is tied to how they appear, not how they feel.
She added: "Over time, this can contribute to emotional insecurity or a sense of not being truly seen or valued."
Cast's clip has been viewed more than 2.6 million times, and the online reaction has been fierce.
"Most people have been angry and disgusted with what I saw," Cast said.
"Several have shared stories of similar things they have seen; others voiced this is the reason they do not follow creators who post videos of their children," she continued. "A lot of people have voiced they wish it was not allowed to record children. A select few were in support of the mom, stating she was just trying to pay her bills."
Joseph said that it is fine for parents to take photos or share joyful moments online.
"But, when the performance replaces connection, or when the child is treated like a prop, it crosses a line," she added. "Children need real engagement, not curated snippets. And, as adults, we need to ask ourselves who the attention is really for—because kids always know when our hearts aren't truly with them."
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