Woman Urged Not to Be Annoyed With Father-in-Law for Ruining Her Front Yard

The internet has urged a woman not to be annoyed with her father-in-law for messing up her yard, which he had offered to revamp for free.

In a post shared on Mumsnet earlier in February, under the username Rosieposey91, she explained that recently her father-in-law offered to re-landscape her garden for free, and although she wasn't too keen on it, she agreed because she wouldn't have been able to pay a professional to do the job for at least a couple of years.

According to luxury real estate firm RubyHome, 71.5 million houses in the United States do gardening activities, and it's in the top three gardening countries after Australia and China. About 55 percent of people garden to create a beautiful space, while 43 percent grow food.

woman urged not to argue with father-in-law
File photos of an old man gardening and a worried woman. The internet has urged a woman not to be annoyed with her father-in-law after he messed up the garden he'd offered to revamp. Getty Images

According to her post, her father-in-law did a rushed job, chose "tacky" items, which he's making them pay for, making her garden look cheap.

She said: "Now I'm stuck as to what to do, ask him to take the slabs up and let him carry on or just wait and save and get it done exactly how we want it. All along we have said no to him doing it and he kept insisting.

"I didn't let the [mother-in-law] be involved as last time she was stood on MY drive saying this will go here and we will have that there etc ... they completely baby my husband but I won't have them baby me, I've always been independent and my parents have let me have my own mind etc."

Florence Ann Romano, a personal growth strategist and the author of Build Your Village: A Guide to Finding Joy and Community in Every Stage of Life, told Newsweek that the first step should have been an honest conversation with her father-in-law about her budget and what her vision was.

"He may be very open to this direction and be mindful of her preferences. If this isn't a possibility, and she wants to avoid an awkward situation (or a falling out with her father-in-law), then I would pull the plug on the job. She can simply thank him for his time and creativity, but says she'd like to wait until she can hire a professional for a more elaborate job," she added.

Most of the 668 people who answered the Am I Being Unreasonable poll agreed she was in fact being unreasonable, and many commented saying she should stop him now.

'Wait and Save Up'

PermanentTemporary commented: "I'd just ask him to stop, then wait and save up. Write down somewhere 'it wasn't worth it' just to remind yourself that gifts always come with strings that trip you up. I have a [lovely] [father-in-law] who is keen to be generous and it can take some working around."

And said DashboardConfessional said: "I'd just let him do it now and save up. The time to stop him was when the first "wrong" thing was put down."

Another user, Eastereggsboxedupready wrote: "Take them up and say they got stolen. My [father-in-law] was the same. Offered to fix our toilet cistern... Dropped a hammer on [it] and smashed it. He didn't offer to replace it either... Insisted he [replaced] a broken floor tile. Then broke the surrounding ones trying to get it up. List is endless. Best one was blocked sink. Unblocked it...poured the gunk down the sink without pipes replaced... Big smelly mess. All jobs I was more than happy to do myself...

WednesdaysPlaits commented: "Thank [Father-In-Law] for his efforts and then once he's left, spend the weekend tweaking what [he's] done so that [it's] more in line with what you had in mind. He probably won't even notice, especially if you add to what he did.

"I've just spent £400 ($482) on fake plants. I have a large house with large planters at first floor level on a north-facing aspect in a hard-to-reach area. They have their place. I also have fake trees in the house Shock. Practically all plants you see in window boxes, planters, etc in high-end commercial premises are fake.

And catmg added: "You Are Being Unreasonable]. You knew you wouldn't get what you wanted, to the standard you wanted, but you decided to press on regardless and let your [Father-In-Law] do the work. Surely his favor was to do the actual work though, not to pay for all your items?"

Newsweek wasn't able to verify the details of the case.

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