Mom Excluding Childless Best Friends From Daughter's Birthday Party Backed

A woman has been backed after deciding not to invite several childless best friends to her daughter's birthday party.

It's not uncommon for parents to exclude certain friends or classmates from their child's birthday celebrations. But their own friends? That's a little less common. However, in this instance, the woman had her reasons.

According to a Mumsnet post penned by the party-planning mom, though the woman's friends were left "upset" by the snub, she felt she "had to draw the line somewhere" when it came to who was allowed to attend—and many online were inclined to agree.

While the friends may have missed out on the festivities, research suggests those choosing not to have children are not necessarily missing out on some of life's greatest joys.

In 2021, psychologists from Michigan State University polled nearly 1,000 adults on the topic of whether or not they have had children.

The study, which was published in the scientific journal PLOS ONE, also saw participants quizzed on their levels of life satisfaction.

Researchers found there was little difference in life satisfaction between those who had and those who had not had children, while the scientists also noted limited differences in the personality traits of the two groupings.

In this instance, however, having kids appears to have been a prerequisite for those wishing to attend the young daughter's birthday party.

"They don't have children and I've only invited her friends from nursery or friends of mine that have children that she hangs around with," the mom explained, while also citing the fact they "chose a tiny venue" for the event so had to be selective.

She also noted that the invite list was so strict she chose to not even invite family. However, the reaction to the snub has left the woman feeling guilty. "I don't want to upset them as they have been amazing friends and are great with my daughter," she wrote. "But I had to draw the line somewhere."

Commenting on the situation, Abigayle Majul, a licensed professional counselor with Thriveworks, told Newsweek that clear and open communication was key.

"Having to set boundaries against your best friends is one of the most difficult things to do, and many times, boundaries will have to be set that you've never had to set before," she said.

"Being able to describe your situation, express your emotion, and also be affirming to your friends would be helpful; continue to reinforce that you are very limited on space and your daughter is at an age where she is needing to develop social skills and build friendships."

Despite the hurt feelings, Majul felt there were a number of ways in which the mom could remedy the situation and ensure her friends felt included.

"One of the best things that you can do is to have another celebration just with your best friends (and family, too!) and maybe continue to have a 'best friends only' celebration for any future kids that they may have; you are not only honoring your friends but you're setting a tradition moving forward," she said.

"Additionally, being able to include your friends in this planning can also help them to still feel included in your life as you enter a new phase of being a mother of two, while also relieving some of the stress that could be involved."

Others on social media took a more blunt approach to the dilemma. One Mumsnet user, posting as Plumduck, commented: "You're fine. It's your daughter's party, not yours." Anoisagusaris added: "You don't invite adults to a child's party. You invite children."

Snowfal, meanwhile, was perplexed as to why the friends would want to go in the first place. "The question is why does she want to go to a child's party without a child!" they said. "My idea of hell and I have a child who has and goes to parties."

Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.

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A children's birthday and a crying woman.
Stock images of a children's birthday party and a crying woman - a mom has been backed over her decision to not invite her childless best friends to her daughter's birthday. monkeybusinessimages/ AntonioGuillem/Getty