Groom Slammed for Excluding Bride's Mum From Wedding

A fiancé is under fire after it emerged he not only planned his wedding behind his wife's back, but he also set it on a date when her mother won't be able to attend.

In a controversial post shared to Mumsnet, the bride-to-be detailed her future husband's deception. She claims the couple had originally "planned a small wedding for late 2022."

However, this week she was informed there had "been a change of plan" with her fiance and her future mother-in-law deciding between them to move the big day forward to next month.

Now they are set to marry during a trip to the mother-in-law's as part of a "joint" wedding with her future brother-in-law and his wife-to-be.

Though the would-be bride said she is "completely okay" with the idea of having a small wedding in the company of her husband's family and friends, she is upset because her own mom "isn't included" in the plans.

"She is stuck in my home country because of travel restrictions. She wouldn't be able to make it next month," the woman wrote.

Despite expressing her dismay at this turn of events, the woman said her mother-in-law is "adamant she doesn't want to wait for her" and has promised to "take her out for dinner once she's able to come."

The woman suspects she does not want to wait because her mother is "not paying for half of the party" and "can't afford it just yet."

It's a situation that she says has left her "really upset," not least over how little she has been consulted about any of the plans.

"They didn't include me in any decisions as it is up to my mother-in-law, my fiancé and his brother only to discuss and decide apparently," she wrote.

For many, responding in the 295 replies to the original message, the post had serious alarm bells ringing.

Solbunny asked: "If your fiancé and his family are prepared to steamroll over your very reasonable wishes for your wedding, what do you suppose the rest of your married life might look like?"

MissBattleAxe agreed: "You're being bulldozed and it doesn't bode well for a happy future where your wishes are respected."

Tulips21 was especially scathing of the groom and his family. "Your mother-in-law sounds awful and your fiance too," they wrote. "He isn't marrying his mother, he is meant to be marrying you." DelphniumBlue also urged the bride-to-be: "put your foot down and explain you want a celebration for your wedding with your own mother there. Don't let them bully you."

They added: "I'm sure it's convenient, but your fiance needs to realize that he should be supporting you, not his mother. Time he got used to the idea that you should be his priority now."

Those sentiments were echoed by Mediumbrownmug, who wrote: "You need to explain this to your fiancé, and let him know you do not expect him to have your wedding ceremony without his mother present, nor should he for you."

Research has shown the importance would-be brides place on giving their weddings a personal touch - something this groom, in particular, failed to heed. According to a study published by Brides, 51 percent of women consider "personal style" to be a top priority when it comes to planning their nuptials.

Brides-to-be have taken center stage in several recent major viral stories. One woman made headlines after uninviting her best friend from her big day after her sister heard the ex-pal bad-mouthing the groom during her bachelorette party.

Elsewhere, another soon-to-be-wed woman had to contend with unhappy guests demanding she cover the childcare costs incurred as a result of attending her adult-only ceremony.

A guilty looking husband, wife and mother-in-law.
A file photo of a couple and an older woman. A groom-to-be is under fire after arranging his wedding on a date his mother-in-law is unable to attend. monkeybusinessimages/Getty

Editor's Picks

Newsweek cover
  • Newsweek magazine delivered to your door
  • Unlimited access to Newsweek.com
  • Ad free Newsweek.com experience
  • iOS and Android app access
  • All newsletters + podcasts
Newsweek cover
  • Unlimited access to Newsweek.com
  • Ad free Newsweek.com experience
  • iOS and Android app access
  • All newsletters + podcasts