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By Maria Morava
Relationships Reporter
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If you've been even moderately online in the past few years, it's likely you've heard of the "tradwife."
Taking the internet by storm since 2018, the trend of tradwives—or traditional wives—has been central to an online discourse around homemaking and femininity. But who are some of the most recognizable faces in this fad? And what are the implications of these influencers' curated lives in our daily digital spaces?
Newsweek spoke to Marika Lindholm, Ph.D., sociologist and co-editor of the new book, Between Us: Healing Ourselves and Changing the World Through Sociology, to learn more about the trend and its evolution.
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"Tradwives are women who make the choice to focus on homemaking rather than entering the labor market. Dependent on their husband's financial support, they stay home to cook, clean, raise children and all other tasks in the domestic realm," Lindholm said. "This movement emerged in 2018 with some influencers on TikTok and Instagram showcasing their tradwife lifestyle and then gained strength during the pandemic."
Who Are the Internet's Famous Tradwives?
While TikTok and Instagram are flooded with tradwives of all levels of online success, there are a few recognizable faces at the head of the trend.
Estee Williams
A popular tradwife and open spokesperson for the movement, Estee Williams, 26, has been making content about being a tradwife since 2022. With 194,000 followers on her TikTok, she posts everything from videos about the "biblical submission" of women to men, to tips for attracting "masculine men."
"[A tradwife] is a woman who chooses to live a more traditional life, with ultratraditional gender roles," she said in a 2022 video explaining her position. "It doesn't mean we are trying to take away what women fought for."
Nara Smith
South African and German model Nara Smith knows how to make tradwife life look effortless. Smith, 22, is a mother of three children most known for her elaborate cooking videos—which often involve the very ingredients themselves being made from scratch—to the tune of her soothing voice. With 7.7 million followers, Smith is a popular, and newer, face in the tradwife trend.
Smith and her model husband, Lucky Blue Smith, are both Mormon, lending some momentum to a growing discourse about instances of tradwife/Mormonism overlap.
Hannah Neeleman
Known as Ballerina Farm—the Utah farm she lives on with her family—on TikTok and Instagram, Hannah Neeleman is another Mormon tradwife with millions of followers online: 7.2 million on TikTok, to be precise. As a mother of eight, Neeleman posts from the farm about everything from meal preparation to parenting.
Neeleman is a Juilliard-trained dancer who gave up prospects of professional dance for life on the farm. Her sourdough baking and child-rearing make the Ballerina Farm seem idyllic.
Is the Tradwife Life Realistic?
Lindholm told Newsweek that despite the beautiful, atmospheric promises of the tradwife way, it's not for everyone—even if they want it.
"An overview of the major tradwife influencers reveals a romanticized vision of domesticity that harks back to the stereotype of a 1950s housewife striving for domestic perfection," she said. "As a sociologist I need to point out that historically most women, especially women of color, have had to do paid work—so the goal of being a homemaker dependent on a husband harks back to a privileged time of middle- and upper-class white womanhood that is currently not economically feasible for most American women."
While tradwives' lives look many different ways, they share a common thesis: A woman's purpose is to be a homemaker.
Lindholm said she believes the appeal online is partly due to the illusion that being a homemaker is not only possible, but a way out of societal pressure to navigate both home and work responsibilities as a woman.
"I'm convinced that the reason the tradwife movement resonates and gains followers on TikTok, Instagram and YouTube is because so many of us are struggling with the harsh reality of combining paid work and family responsibilities," she said. "Women in particular are expected to work as if they don't have children and parent as if they don't work, therefore, the lure of being a stay-at-home mom is particularly compelling."
But even when one separates paid work and the work of keeping a home—the latter still doesn't shape up to be as "alluring and calm" as some influencers make it seem: "I'm very concerned that young women who follow tradwife influencers won't be able to distinguish between the digital fantasy and the messy reality of raising a family," Lindholm said.
What About the Men?
While much public attention is focused on the women in the tradwife setup, Lindholm believes there are also things to be said for a man's role in this dynamic. While the argument is often made that tradwives reverting to traditional gender roles is anti-feminist and regressive, she said that men don't necessarily benefit either.
"An issue that's rarely addressed is what does this movement mean for men?" she said. "I'm convinced that the tradwife movement is also a step back for men. The male breadwinner role separates fathers from their children in ways that both dads and kids regret. Moreover, bearing all the financial burden can be stressful and even overwhelming."
Placing the financial burden on men also makes women more vulnerable to isolation and dependency within abusive relationships, as they don't build independent financial resources.
"I've seen how homemakers don't believe that they can succeed and survive on their own," Lindholm said.
She is not denying that the tradwife life is compelling though. No matter where on the political spectrum someone sits, influencer videos make homemaking look like an easy way to opt out of the multiple forms of labor women are expected to perform. And until the work/life balance becomes generally more manageable and accessible for everyone, Lindholm said the trend will likely continue.
"Watching a pleasing, escapist video of a woman enjoying her domestic life to the fullest must be met with some skepticism, because fulfilling that dream is out of reach for most American families," she said. "Sure, women can choose to stay home, but the fancy homes, the spotless kitchens, the home schooling, the crafts, the big brood of children is expensive, demanding, and delusory.
"It's imperative that young women approach this content with a healthy awareness that it's simply an escapist fantasy."
Newsweek reached out to Williams, Smith and Neeleman for comment via TikTok.
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