'Nasty Habit': Wife Defended for Reminding Husband Who Pays the Bills

Thousands of internet commenters sided with one woman after she recounted her searing response to complaints about her "nasty" bathtime habit.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor u/eovjvwv (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) said her husband confronted her about eating and drinking in the bathroom and revealed the words that stopped him dead in his tracks.

Titled, "[Am I the a**hole] for telling my husband he can tell me where to eat when he pays the bills?" the since-deleted post has received nearly 15,000 votes and 5,000 comments.

Beginning with the explanation that her husband recently lost his job, the original poster said she has financially supported the couple for the past few months and added that they live in a house that she inherited from her grandmother.

Continuing to explain that she enjoys a snack and drink in the comfort of her bathtub "every now and then," the original poster also said her husband despises this routine and last night, he decided to do something about it.

"I had a particularly rough day at work...so when I got home I poured myself a glass of wine, grabbed a snack and went to take a nice relaxing bath," OP wrote. "My husband comes in and takes my wine and snacks and tells me I can't eat in the bathroom anymore and [says] 'Now that we're married you're going to have to change this nasty habit of yours.'"

"I laughed at him thinking he was joking but when he started walking out I told him he can't dictate what I do," OP continued. "He said 'I won't allow this nasty habit in my home.'"

"This is where I may be the a**hole," OP added. "I looked at him and said 'Your house? Let's make a deal, you can dictate where I eat when you pay all the bills.' [Then] grabbed my wine glass from him and walked away."

In 2019, data collected by Business Insider revealed that financial issues are the fifth most-common reason for divorce in the United States, with nearly 40 percent of polled couples reporting their separation was in part due to arguments over money.

And while it was noted that money was not "the most pertinent reason for divorce,", many couples told Business Insider that these types of disagreements certainly "contribute[d] to increased stress and tension within the relationship."

For married couples, money issues often come as a result of differing opinions on spending, large impulse purchases and numerous forms of debt, including credit cards and student loans.

Employment status is also tied directly to financial tension and, in the case of married men, can be indicative of a relationship's future.

Last decade, Harvard University professor Alexandra Killewald reported that in the U.S., husbands without full-time jobs were 33 percent more likely to divorce than their employed counterparts.

Couple arguing about eating in bathroom
Members of Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole forum defended one woman who bluntly reminded her husband that she pays all of the couple's bills. dragana991/iStock / Getty Images Plus

Throughout the comment section of the viral Reddit post, Redditors applauded the original poster for putting her husband in his place and speculated that OP's marriage could be headed in a similar direction to others which have included an unemployed partner.

"I would leave someone who tried to dictate where I can eat," Redditor u/la-maman commented, receiving more than 1,000 votes. "And it's not even his house."

"The person not doing anything all day doesn't get to set rules for other people," they added. "Sounds like he's taking advantage of you."

Redditor u/Physical-Energy-6982, whose comment has received nearly 8,000 votes, called out the original poster's husband for using the couple's marriage status as justification for his controlling behavior.

"Now that we're married, you're going to have to change this nasty habit of yours," they wrote, parroting OP's husband.

"Now that we're married doesn't mean I'm going to start putting up with behavior like this," they added, sarcastically. "[Not the a**hole]."

In the post's top comment, which has received nearly 15,000 votes, Redditor u/thewhiterosequeen also took direct aim at the original poster's husband and questioned what right he had to confront OP so aggressively.

"Yikes. He's adamant on changing you after you're married, claims the home you inherited as his home, and [has] no job and isn't looking?" they wrote. "I hope you had a prenup about the house. He's obviously bringing nothing to the table and you know obviously you're [not the a**hole]."