Woman Slammed for Reaction to Fiancé Stalking His Ex: 'Dangerous Time'

Commenters criticized a woman's reaction after being told her fiancé is stalking his ex from college.

In the post titled "AITA for telling his fiancee and parents that he's stalking me?" the anonymous 27-year-old, known as u/atuatoad, explained that her ex-boyfriend from college was stalking her. The post can be found here.

Published in the popular "Am I The A**hole" forum, the post received more than 10,000 upvotes and 600 comments, many from users warning her that her situation is volatile and potentially dangerous.

Stalking is a precursor for further violence, with 54 percent of femicide victims reporting their situation to the police before they were killed by their stalker. It is also estimated that nearly one in seven stalking victims are forced to move due to their stalker.

Woman slammed for reaction to fiance's secret
A woman was criticized after calling her fiancé's ex a "liar" after she informed her that he was stalking her. Deagreez/iStock/Getty Images Plus

In the post, the woman said she only dated the guy briefly and that she ended up having to move because he "wouldn't let" her break up with him.

Years later, she said she still gets social media requests from new accounts he made after she blocked the others.

"I also found out he got access to my work calendar for a little while by making a fake 'client' account," the post read. "Actual clients of mine can see my availability to book meetings but he was just trying to see when I was working I think."

Recently, the woman moved back to her old town and joined a hiking group. She said that one day while she was hiking, she ran into her ex.

"I damn near s**t a brick when I saw him and I just left," the post read. "He was honestly scaring me, but cops don't really do s**t until an actual crime has happened. And making 15 fake Instagrams and showing up at one hiking group didn't seem like something they'd take seriously."

But she decided to file a police report regardless. She also unblocked him long enough to find his parents' Facebook accounts and also discovered her stalker was engaged.

In response, the woman gathered all of the evidence, including screenshots of the 15 Instagram accounts, the fake client account, and a picture of him from the hike, and sent them to his family and fiancée on Facebook.

She explained that she dated him in college six years ago and that he tries to follow her "multiple times a year." She also told them about the hiking situation and how she filed a police report.

The woman said she told his fiancée and parents that she would pursue legal action if they didn't "talk some sense into him."

Although his parents didn't reply, his fiancée "flipped out" and called the woman a "liar."

"Then his parents chimed in in the group chat saying that they would have a talk with their son but the way I brought this to their attention with a Facebook messenger group was insensitive," the post read.

Frustrated, the woman replied that stalking someone was "insensitive" and that she would appreciate it if they would tell him to end the behavior.

The woman added that the three of them blocked her number and that she hasn't heard from her ex.

"I don't know if his family or girl believes me but I'm hoping that the fact that they probably asked him about it scared him straight," the post read. "AITA for having put a stop to stalking like this?"

More than 600 users commented on the post, many offering support to the woman and warning her about the potential danger that could occur now that she got his family involved.

"OP, since he probably knows that you've reached out to his family, I'm sorry to say that this is a potentially dangerous time," one user warned. "He might escalate and try to see you, cause problems at your work, etc. So I highly suggest contacting a local domestic violence org to get their suggestions and support."

The user said that a local domestic violence organization could potentially help her get a protective order.

"You're already being very nice about it considering what a creep he is," another user commented.

"If she still wants to marry him, it's really on her. Who knows? Maybe she dumps his ass, and he switches targets. Which is also pretty horrifying."

"Filing the police report was the right thing," another commented. "Also look at your state laws regarding stalking. You can also speak to one of the domestic violence detectives at your local police department and see what they recommend."

According to the CDC, one in every six women living in America have been stalked at some point in their lives. Often, the stalker is someone the victim knows with an estimated 66 percent of stalkers being current or former intimate partners.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reported that women between the ages of 18 and 24 have the highest rate of stalking victimization. Reports also show that stalking victims suffer from higher rates of depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, and insomnia than the general public.

Newsweek reached out to u/actuatoad for comment.

In another viral post from Reddit, a woman was praised for leaving her date stranded after she claims he made "rude" comments all night.

Two sisters were recently criticized on Reddit for expecting their brother to give them his entire inheritance instead of his wife. A boy's mom and stepdad were also criticized after using part of his inheritance to purchase a new home.