'Banned': Woman Ripped for Demanding Roommate Dump Alcohol for Boyfriend

Members of a popular internet forum scoffed after one woman explained how her roommate's most recent relationship sparked controversy for their entire household.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor u/Beingbtchy (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) described her friend and roommate as a "relationship chameleon" and detailed revealed how her current boyfriend's sobriety has transformed their apartment dynamic.

Titled, "[Am I the a**hole] for flipping out on my roommate when she tried to ban drinking and alcohol from our apartment?" the post has received nearly 6,500 votes and 600 comments in the last day.

Writing that her roommate recently gave up alcohol in solidarity with her boyfriend, who is in recovery from alcoholism, the original poster said she was supportive of the lifestyle change—but only for a short time.

"Right after announcing her newly sober lifestyle she starts being judgemental and pushy," OP wrote. "We have a bar cart that was pretty pricey that's well stocked [and] she told me we need to get rid of it."

"The final straw was last night," OP wrote. "My [boyfriend] came over...and I made us a super nice meal [and] he brought over nice wine. [My roommate] and her [boyfriend] came home early...and she freaks out saying how she told me she banned alcohol from our apartment."

"I snapped and told her she is ridiculous, this is my apartment and that when this guy eventually gets sick of her, she will be drinking again," OP continued. "She grabbed sober [boyfriend] and stormed out."

"I can't keep living like this," OP added.

Dating chameleons, also called relationship chameleons, are individuals who completely transform their personalities and lifestyles to mirror whoever they're dating.

In 2017, dating website Bolde published a list of indicators someone is a dating chameleon. Among the list were numerous personality adjustments, including taking on all of a partner's interests, schedule changes to spend more time together and a lack of time spent with friends in general.

One adjustment, however, stands out among the rest and is often a catalyst for conflict with friends and family outside of the relationship.

Shifting views on big issues and important topics—like the consumption of alcohol—are a final push for many teetering on the dating chameleon seesaw and can erase any semblance of the person who existed before their current relationship.

And while acts of solidarity by loved ones can be helpful for those in recovery from alcoholism and other substance abuse issues, forcing others into the same habits can spark quick conflict—especially when a third party is involved.

Roommates argue about banning alcohol from home
Members of Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole defended one woman who called out her roommate for forcing her boyfriend's sober lifestyle on their household. Prostock-Studio/iStock / Getty Images Plus

Throughout the comment section of the viral Reddit post authored by u/Beingbtchy, Redditors were adamant that the original poster's roommate was out of line to "ban" alcohol from the apartment while judging OP for not adhering to her new lifestyle.

"She either needs to live alone or understand she doesn't run the world," Redditor u/NiteGrimwood wrote in the post's top comment, which has received nearly 8,500 votes. "This is not like you are renting a room from her house...she needed a reality check."

Redditor u/bamf1701, whose comment has received more than 2,200 votes, offered a similar response.

"[Not the a**hole]," they wrote. "Like you said - this is your apartment also. Any decisions like that need to be made between the two of you, not just made by decree from one."

"It's fine for her to stop drinking in solidarity with her boyfriend," they added. "What isn't fine is when she tries to force it on everyone around her."

In a separate comment, which has received nearly 2,000 votes, Redditor u/ToastylilToast questioned if the original poster's roommate's actions were intended to benefit her new boyfriend, or herself.

"She was acting like she herself was in recovery, which is bulls**t," they wrote. "She doesn't have a drinking problem so there's no reason for her to ban it from YOUR home."