'Controlling' Husband Slammed For Canceling Wife's Job Interview

A woman has been urged to "get out" of her marriage after revealing her husband canceled her upcoming job interview.

Coercive control is an insidious form of domestic abuse that sees the abuser apply humiliation and intimidation tactics on their victim to instill fear. Abusers will often take steps to make their victim increasingly isolated and exploited with any independence they once had, financially or otherwise, stripped away.

But while coercive control has been made illegal in countries like the U.K., it is not considered a crime in itself in the U.S. This is despite research from the Rutgers School of Public Affairs and Administration showing 60 to 80 percent of women who sought assistance due to an abusive partner saying they experienced coercive control.

It's an alarming situation and one that has once again been thrown into the spotlight after a woman took to Reddit to share her story. Writing in a post upvoted nearly 18,000 times on the "Am I The A**hole?" subreddit, an unnamed woman opened up about how she has spent the past few years out of work because of her "physical disabilities."

"No company wanted to hire me for the past couple of years and my husband said that it's better I just stay home and not worry about working," she said.

It was decided that he would become "the breadwinner," however that came at a cost to the woman who was left doing "100 percent" of the chores around the house as a result, despite her disabilities.

"His excuse for not doing anything to help is that I stay at home 24/7," she said.

Unhappy at this arrangement, he promised her that he would start helping around the house again if she got a job. When she told him she wanted to return to work, however, he "laughed and said 'good luck.'" After several months of looking with little success, she landed an interview with a company that was happy for her to work from home due to her disability.

Yet just a few days before she was due to meet with her prospective employer, she learned the interview had been canceled. But it was only when someone reached out to ask why she had backed out that she learned the truth: her husband had canceled it.

When she confronted her partner over his actions he was unrepentant, telling her the job "had lots of requirements" and she wasn't "fit" for it. He said that in canceling he had spared her "the heartache of being rejected."

Despite insisting he was "concerned" about her wellbeing, her husband then flipped out after she suggested he didn't want her to work because they would have to split chores again.

"He threw a fit about how unreasonable and selfish I was to even consider a job without speaking to him first," she wrote.

The worried woman said her husband has been giving her the "cold shoulder" ever since and, in a disturbing twist, has deleted her social media accounts, claiming they are bad for her "mental health."

Given the response the post generated on Reddit, it's no wonder her husband tried to deny her access to social media.

"This man has extreme control issues! RUN!" Oh-look-a-shiny wrote. "He should be lifting you up and encouraging your growth and happiness." Catatomical said: "I read that first line and said out loud 'GET OUT!' This man has red flags as far as the eye can see. RUN."

"This is scary," oOoBeckaoOo commented. "He is not looking out for you and he is isolating you. Why? No idea but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if you lose the Internet at your home and he cancels your cell service."

ApprehensiveHalf8613 urged the woman to take practical steps by preparing a "go bag" containing "all your important documents, a stash of money, a new phone or a new prepaid SIM card if that's what your phone uses."

JohnSavage777 was similarly pessimistic about her situation. "She's been dependent on him, now started to regain a little bit of independence and he went nuclear," they said. "Things are about to get a lot worse."

Newsweek has contacted the original poster for comment.

The situation stands in stark contrast to another viral story which saw the internet side with a husband who said his stay-at-home wife should be responsible for all housework.

Another husband, meanwhile, was ridiculed online after a list of his demands for his "birthday month" was shared on Reddit.

A man and a woman arguing.
Stock image of a man and a woman arguing on a couch - a woman has been urged to "run" after revealing her husband canceled her job interview and cut her off from social media. fizkes/Getty