Internet Calls Out Woman for Telling Ex to Cancel His Vacation for Daughter

In a post going viral on social media, the internet has called out a woman for telling her ex to cancel his vacation with his girlfriend in case his daughter needs him.

Published to Reddit's popular r/AmITheA**hole forum, a woman under the username u/iko908 shared her story in order to get the opinion of many to determine if she is in the wrong. The viral post has over 4,000 upvotes and 1,000 comments.

The Redditor began her story by explaining that her daughter recently got sick while vacationing with her father. Whenever her daughter gets upset, she wants a specific parent to help her calm down. If it's not the parent she wants it's tough to get her to relax. She stated that she and her ex do not live together, so when the original poster's (OP) daughter woke up at 2 a.m. after having a nightmare, she wanted her father.

Woma slammed for having ex cancel vacation
The internet has called out a woman for telling her ex to cancel his vacation just in case his daughter needs him. Deagreez/iStock / Getty Images Plus

The OP decided to call her ex to urge him to come over and help his daughter get back to sleep.

She wrote, "He came over and managed to get her back to sleep but because she was sleeping on him, he didn't want to move in case he woke her up again. He asked me to wake him up by 8am as he was supposed to be leaving for a vacation with his girlfriend a few hours later. I asked him not to go because I was worried our daughter would want him while he was away. After discussing it, he agreed not to.

"A few hours after he left, the girlfriend called me as she was upset, I had asked him to come over at 2am and because he cancelled their vacation at the last minute because of me. She told me I was acting like a jealous ex-wife and accused me of using our daughter to control my ex which isn't true," she concluded.

Newsweek reached out to u/iko908 for comment.

Do you have a child where it seems almost impossible to get them to calm down? Here are some ways to teach them how to settle down: try going for a walk, having them take some deep breaths, have them count to ten or higher, give them a hug, put on music they enjoy or try to make them laugh, per

When a child is upset, it is good to teach them how to relax and have some self-control techniques. An article written for PBS discusses three different ways to teach children self-control.

  1. Change the situation: Changing the situation can help reduce temptation. For example, sitting siblings away from each other to stop them from touching one another or for older kids, putting the cell phone away until homework is completed.
  2. Change their thinking: Using this technique helps children of all ages have a different perspective on a situation. Asking children questions about what would be a fair solution to their problems and what parents/teachers could do to help them.
  3. Change their response: Instead of throwing a temper tantrum, lashing out or crying, try teaching your child how they could respond instead. One technique is a child having a distraction that takes their mind off what's wrong. Examples: math problems, remembering a fond memory and drawing.

Reddit users were quick to comment, slamming the OP.

"Your daughter needs to learn that you and her father can't always be available. Better sooner than later. So yes for me [you're the a**hole]. You know your Ex was going on a vacation with his gf and you still called him at 2am. You took the easy way for you, made things more difficult for your ex and it did not help your daughter to become somewhat more independent," wrote u/Natsuru_Blaustahl, receiving the top comment with over 10,000 upvotes.

"So does that mean you won't be having any vacations either 'just in case' [you're the a**hole]," u/No_Scarcity3401 exclaimed.

u/lemon_starburst616 explained, "[You're the a**hole] Appeasing her at all costs is only hurting your daughter. You're not doing what's best for her. You're placating her because it's convenient. If you really want to help her, you need to address this and help her work through it. Use a therapist if need be."

U/dart1126 questioned, "[You're the a**hole]. Great that he came over at 2 am. Especially when he's trying to leave the next day, that was being a very supportive coparent and loving dad. Why is that not enough for you?"