Mom Slammed for Refusing To Let Daughter Cut Her Long Hair: 'Obsessed'

The internet has slammed a mom who refused to let her daughter cut her long hair after a dad revealed he went against his wife's wishes by taking their daughter to the salon.

Shared on Reddit on Sunday, user aitathrowaway795939 posted the story that now has more than 23,000 upvotes and thousands of comments.

In the post, he explained: "Me and my wife have a little girl, who I'll be calling Anna. Anna has very thick, blonde and curly hair that my wife adores. Ever since she was a toddler, she'd spend hours doing her hair every day, braiding it, straightening it and styling it in all sorts of ways.

"Our bathroom cabinets are always filled to the brim with a bunch of hair lotions, oils, creams and other fancy products I don't even know the names of. I think it's more than fair to say that my wife's a bit obsessed with the whole thing."

But the dad explained that 8-year-old Anna was not as keen on having her hair done. With hair that reached past her waist, he explained that while it looked lovely, she hated getting it brushed every morning.

"Lately she's been asking for a shorter haircut," explained the Reddit user. "My wife ignored her whenever the topic was brought up in hopes that she'd forget about it, but none of that ended up happening."

Instead, Anna asked her dad if he would take her to have her haircut: "I was reluctant to at first because I didn't know how my wife would react, but I agreed when I saw just how excited the kid was over something as simple as a haircut."

Online site Everyday Feminism advocates for allowing children to choose their own hairstyle. Writer Britni de la Cretaz said: "It boils down to the fact that, as a feminist, I believe in bodily autonomy—not just for me but for everyone." In the article, she explains that choosing their own hairstyle gives children ownership of their bodies, teaches them that their wishes should be respected, and helps them develop a sense of self.

The dad revealed that he drove his daughter to the hairdresser, where she got to flip through magazines and pick a picture of a haircut. "When she chose a really short clipper cut, I knew I was gonna be in deep s*** with my wife," wrote the Redditor. "At that point though, there was no turning back. I mean, what could I have really done? Told her that no, she can't get the haircut she was so over the moon about because her mom wouldn't like it?"

Young girl has haircut
A file photo of a young girl getting a bob haircut. The internet has sided with a dad who took his daughter for the haircut she wanted despite his wife's wishes. Vagengeym_Elena/Getty Images

After the haircut, he revealed that Anna couldn't stop smiling—showing everyone at the salon her new look and even asking for pictures to be taken when she usually hates having her photo taken.

But when his wife returned home from work, the Redditor says things quickly took a turn.

"She refused to even look at Anna," he said. "[She] locked herself in her room and cried and then got in the car and drove off. It's been a day now and she's still not back. I knew she wouldn't react well to the haircut, but I wasn't expecting her to take it this badly. The kid's upset too and no matter how much I reassure her she still thinks she's in trouble for getting her hair cut."

Despite the Reddit user's concern, internet users overwhelmingly sided with the dad— telling him that he did the right thing.

One commenter said: "This isn't about Anna's hair. It's about her body autonomy. I've made a few comments elsewhere, but this situation has been sitting on my mind. What your wife has been doing and is continuing to do is sending the message to Anna that her body is not her own, and despite her own desires, she should put other people's feelings about what she does with her body first. Is this really the message you want your daughter learning? Think about the long-term implications of learning to give in to other people's wants about her body."

Another Reddit user wrote: "She's 8 and she should have a say in how she wears her hair," while one commenter said: "My mom never let me choose how I got my haircut, I'm now over 40 and still resent her for it. It's just hair. Your wife is being way overdramatic."

"The joy this cut gave your kid is what is important," wrote another user. "You supported your kid's body autonomy and stopped her from experiencing daily pain from her mother."

Newsweek has reached out to aitathrowaway795939 for comment.