World's Worst Guard Dog Stars in Hilarious Video: 'Defender of the House'

A terrified canine had pet fans in stitches after starring in what might be a contender for the world's worst guard dog audition.

Guard dogs or watchdogs are commonly deployed to protect property against unwanted visitors, human or other.

While some owners will enlist especially fearsome breeds for the task, for others simply having a dog in the house is seen as a way to bolster security.

However, the dog owner posting to TikTok as Christian Lanier might want to reassess his canine's suitability for that particular task.

In a clip viewed over 10 million times, Lanier decided to put his dog's tough guy credentials to the test. It didn't go well—as you can see here.

That's not necessarily a huge surprise though.

While some dogs can prove effectively intimidating, fearsome or willing to attack when confronting an intruder, the majority of dogs are just big scaredy cats at heart.

In fact, a 2020 Finnish study of some 13,700 pet dogs found 72.5 percent of canines experienced at least one form of anxiety.

Researchers found noise sensitivity was the most common form with 32 percent of dogs experiencing this type of anxiety. Fireworks (26 percent) were found to be the most common concern.

The study also showed 29 percent of dogs experience fear, with 17 percent of that group afraid of other dogs while 15 percent were wary of strangers and 11 percent feared new or unique experiences.

A beware of dog sign and dog.
Stock image of a "beware of dog" sign and a guard dog. Video footage of a dog's panicked reaction to its owner coming home is proving popular. sanfel / Konoplytska/Getty

Given those figures, it's hardly surprising that Lanier's canine would react with terror when his owner, who is currently in the process of decorating his home, entered the property wearing a white face mask and overalls.

Lanier, granted, did appear to exacerbate the situation by barking like a dog and following his pet pooch through the property, but it's fair to say his canine's reaction was a little over the top.

As the video shows, when Lanier first enters he begins barking, prompting the dog to scurry off in the opposite direction.

Lanier walks after him, and the dog slides from side to side on the bare wooden floors in cartoonish fashion as he desperately tries to make his escape.

The dog eventually eyes his escape route, running to a room at the back of the house before leaping through an open window.

Once he reaches the safety of the garden, however, he is positively transformed. Stopping still, he turns to look back at the house, adopting a rigid upright pose as if attempting to reaffirm his guard dog credentials.

Unfortunately, that particular ship has well and truly sailed—not that anyone is begrudging the dog's adorably funny reaction, of course.

Pancho.tortilla loved "the way he leaped out the window to safety" with brodejako quipping that the dog has "been waiting to use this escape route HIS WHOLE LIFE."

Devon Lopez adored the way the petrified pooch managed to rack up "5 miles worth of steps but only ran 30 feet" with ruth_prendez tickled at how he was "running so fast and so slow at the same time."

Shouldn_tell noted the way "he hit almost every dang wall he could find" on his way out while badgrlrere was in awe of the canine's "Scooby Doo run."

Mud.nymph imagined the dog shouting "you can have everything they own! just don't hurt me!!!" as he ran while sydneyyyyya was one of several people to note how his "whole personality changed when he jumped out the window."

Nazarahshona agreed that the "stance after he jumped out" was hilarious with Moniq504 quipping: "defender of the house!" He may not be cut out for guard dog duty, but this dog certainly deserves a biscuit after his ordeal.

Newsweek has contacted Lanier for comment.