Man Slammed for Attempting to Bring 4 Children to 'Cannabis' Wedding

Commenters slammed a man after he tried to bring his four young children to a wedding his girlfriend invited him to.

The Original Poster (OP), known as u/throw___away0000, posted about the incident in Reddit's popular "Am I The A**hole" forum where it received more than 12,000 upvotes and 690 comments. The post can be found here.

Child-Free Weddings

According to a survey conducted by the Mexican-based wedding website Bodas.com.mx, two out of 10 weddings in Mexico are child-free, but only about 16 percent of all weddings in 2017 and 2018 were child-free.

But the conversation surrounding child-free weddings is often polarizing, with many believing children should be included in weddings and others not wanting any children present.

Man slammed wanting to bring kids wedding
Commenters slammed a man for attempting to bring his four kids to a child-free wedding. Dmytro Duda

Although invitations are often clear about whether children are allowed, it is still on the guest to respect the wishes of the couple getting married and not bring their children.

Some guests are so against the idea of child-free weddings that they decline to attend at all, including a woman who couldn't attend her brother's wedding because she couldn't find a babysitter.

'AITA?'

In the post titled "AITA for taking my bff to a wedding after bf invites his children," the 30-year-old woman said she has been with her boyfriend, 33, for 16 months.

She said her boyfriend has four children from a previous relationship: a 5-year-old and 12-year-old son and 7-year-old twin daughters.

"I met the children around our 7th month dating after meeting their mom around month 5," the post read. "Bio mom and I get along well. I understand her concerns of being replaced and assured her I'm not trying to take her place in any way."

Three months ago, the OP received a wedding invitation from a friend and RSVP'd with her boyfriend as her plus one.

"We discussed the theme of the wedding (cannabis wedding), transportation (open bar) and a few other details," the post read. "I also discussed these plans with my bff (f31) in case there was an emergency."

'What's Going On?'

On the day of the wedding, the woman's boyfriend picked her up from her house with his four children in the back of the car.

"I look at him with a confused look and ask him what's going on," the post read.

She asked him why he brought the kids and if he forgot about the wedding, but he replied that he didn't forget and thought it would be a "good family outing."

"At this point, my mind is blown and I am frustrated," the post read. "I asked him why he thought that, seeing as how we discussed the plans. He said it's not a big deal, they'll only be attending the ceremony. I inform him that my invite is for me and my +1, and not a +5."

She also told him that nothing about the wedding is "appropriate" for children, given it was cannabis-themed.

"He then says 'ok, we can skip the wedding and just have a family day,'" the post read. "I told him absolutely not and that his bad decision making was not going to be my problem. Sent him on his way, called my bff and 2hrs later we attended the beautiful ceremony."

The woman said when her boyfriend found out she went to the wedding without him, he went "ballistic" saying that he felt "replaced" and his children felt "rejected."

"I waited until he ran out of steam and calmly told him that he made these choices," the post read. "We had plans and he chose to try and change them last minute. That his changes were inappropriate and also not my problem."

She said her boyfriend called her an a**hole and won't speak to her unless she apologized to both him and his children. He also said he expects an apology from her friend for "attending the wedding in his place."

'Didn't Say Goodbye'

In an update, the woman said she showed up at her boyfriend's house to talk since he was ignoring her. When she spoke with him, he said he spoke to his ex who "ripped him a new one."

She said his ex texted her in the morning, saying he didn't grow up going to social events and that he's only attended weddings with family.

"Apparently they just show up with friends and family (whatever that means)," the post read. "She also thanked me for having common sense and not taking her children to a 'f**king weed wedding' and if she had known she would've switched weekends with him or came with me herself."

Eventually, the woman showed her boyfriend the Reddit post and he accused her of being inconsiderate about his feelings.

"I took Reddit's advice and just left. Didn't say goodbye, just walked out and blocked him once I got to my car," the post read. "My brain started to hurt at the thought of continuing the conversation let alone the relationship."

Redditor Reactions

Nearly 700 users commented on the post, many calling out OP's boyfriend for behaving in a "deeply concerning" way.

"His actions are selfish and bizarre," one user commented. "They show lack of understanding, maturity, and responsibility—possibly an insight as to his divorced status."

"Here's my uninformed take: It was his turn to have the kids, he declined to make sitter arrangements (or swap weekends with his ex) in order to attend this wedding with you," another commented. "He figured you'd just deal. Good for you for not 'just dealing.'"

"I am very big on respect. I just couldn't imagine showing up with 5 people and 4 of them are children," the OP replied to the user. "To a cannabis event of all things."

"NTA and wow...a wedding is NOT a good family outing," another user commented.

"Him showing up with his four kids and assuming that bringing them along for a 'family outing' would be acceptable is deeply concerning," another user wrote. "It's also ridiculous and potentially controlling that he suggested that you skip the wedding to have a 'family day' with him and his kids."

Newsweek reached out to u/throw___away0000 for comment.

Other Viral Posts

In another viral Reddit post, a man was praised for taking back the deposit he put down for his daughter's wedding and a bride's parents sparked outrage over their wedding gift.

Another woman was supported online after refusing to watch her stepchildren so her husband's ex could attend a wedding.