Mom Backed for Divorcing Husband for 'Repulsive' Comment at In-Law's Party

A woman is being cheered online for divorcing her husband after he drunkenly called her "repulsive."

In a post shared to Reddit's r/TrueOffMyChest forum on August 23, user u/uglyduckling-throw said that her husband of two years made the confession at a family party, as well as admitting to trying to ghost her after their first night together.

The post received over 10,000 upvotes and almost 2,000 comments from Redditors. To thank concerned users for supporting her, she posted an update on August 26 explaining her decision to divorce him.

'The most horrible thing anybody has said about me'

In her original post, uglyduckling-throw said the situation occurred at her sister-in-law's birthday party. Her sister-in-law describes herself as "incurably single" and regularly complains about not being able to find a partner due to her high standards. While moaning about her latest date, the poster's husband chimed in.

"He knew the guy in question apparently and he disagreed with how she, the sister, perceived the guy," she said.

"They were sparring for a little [while] and everyone was laughing because my sister in law is a very funny lady and so is my husband.

Mom Divorcing Husband Over ‘Repulsive’ Comment Backed
A stock photo of a crying woman with her head in her hands while her partner sulks on the sofa next to her. The woman (not pictured) was applauded for doing what's best for her and the couple's young son. fizkes/iStock/Getty Images Plus

"Finally my husband told her that she was very high maintenance and always concentrated on the negative things."

Rather than leaving the conversation there, the husband decided to use an example from his own life—his marriage to uglyduckling-throw.

She wrote: "He then said to take him for example. He found me repulsive the first night we spent together, but he stuck it out and was determined to know me more instead of throwing me away because he's an adult now and needed to start acting like one.

"'And now look at me! I'm the happiest man on earth.'"

The sister-in-law just laughed at her brother's comment and said "that's not how she works," but the poster was devastated.

"The most horrible thing anybody has said about me and yet nobody of those who were listening in seemed to react at all," she said.

"Like it was a totally normal thing to say so I just said that I didn't know that's how he felt about me."

Remembering the first night they slept together, the poster recalled that her now-husband wasn't available for three weeks and realized he had been trying to ghost her.

"On our way home I asked him if he really went to that trip and he smiled guilty and said no, his plan was actually to not see me again. But there was something strong that made him contact me," she said.

Backburner relationships are on the rise

A 2019 study on dating apps revealed that 29 percent of young adult users had ghosted someone they met online. And 25 percent said they'd been ghosted, with 74 percent of those surveyed saying ghosting was an acceptable way to break up with someone.

However, dating apps have also led to a rise in "backburner" relationships. These include "zombieing," when a person who previously ghosted you comes back on the scene; or "pocketing," when a person you're seeing doesn't introduce you to family, friends or other important people in their life.

'No coming back'

Her husband was surprised that she was upset by his comment and didn't seem to understand what the big deal was.

"I told him that it was the most appalling thing I've ever heard and to hear it coming from him? I haven't spoken to him since Saturday," she said.

"I don't know if I want him anymore. We have a son together, 18 months and a dog. I'm trying to keep it together but I just feel so numb."

In the days since the incident occurred, uglyduckling-throw has been weighing her options and has decided that there is "no coming back" for her.

In her update, she wrote: "I know myself and I know my heart.

"How could a marriage work when I can't even look at my SO and the very thought of him ever making love to me again makes me want to throw up?

"And the fact that he thought it was okay to announce to a room full of people, some of them not even friends or family that he thought me repulsive. How was that okay?

"Him sitting there, trying to convince his sister that sometimes you have to give 'lesser' people a chance because they could turn out to be the love of their life! I have a totally different view on our marriage.

"I never thought him to be too good to be with me (and vice versa). We've always been on the same level in my mind. Equals."

Her husband has since moved out, with their young son currently remaining with her. Fortunately, the poster's family is supporting her during this difficult time.

"I have spoken to my parents, brother and his family and they all support me," she said. "I'm lucky to have this love in my life.

"You can't imagine how happy I'm that many of you literally could put themselves in my shoes and see the hurt."

Reddit users praised the woman for making such a tough decision, with the update receiving over 13,000 upvotes and 2,000 comments.

Viva_la_vixie said: "You're not overreacting and clearly this is something that would stick with you if you stayed in the relationship.

"I hope the best for you and your little one!"

"You caught the ick," agreed AveryAverina. "A switch flipped inside your head and you can't see him the same way before. I'm sorry this is happening to you."

While shontsu commented: "There's such a big difference between something like 'She wasn't my usual type' and 'repulsive.'

"Its such an ugly word, and to use it in a public setting to describe you. Its no wonder you can't come back from that."

Newsweek has reached out to u/uglyduckling-throw for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.

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