Internet Divided Over Woman 'Put Off' Dating Man in 40s Who Lives With Mom

A woman who expressed apprehension about dating a man in his 40s that lives with his mother has drawn a mixed response online.

Modern dating represents something of a minefield. With dating apps giving singletons a limited window to essentially sell themselves to a prospective partner, many end up facing a quandary over how much to reveal.

Withholding important information about your life, career or family circumstances can prove a major turn-off when it comes time to meet up. However, reveal too much and you may never end up meeting up at all.

Lies, whether little white ones or massive whoppers, are rampant in the world of online dating.

According to a Pew Research Center survey, as many as 71 percent of dating app users polled said that, in their experience, it was common for people to lie about themselves to appear more desirable.

Yet, as one encounter chronicled in a post shared to Mumsnet shows, even those singletons who are upfront about their life circumstances risk facing judgment in the dating world.

Writing in the viral post, a woman who has recently got back into the dating game described how sparks initially flew when she matched with a man in his 40s on Tinder.

"He comes across as really nice, we have good chat and he's good looking from his photos," she wrote.

According to the post, the man told her early on in their conversations that he's self-employed and that his business was hit "very hard" by the pandemic forcing him to "make some changes."

"One of those is that he had to move back home to his mum's to get back on his feet," she said. The revelation has left her unsure about how to proceed.

"On the one hand, I'm put off by it as I am a mid 30s very independent single parent who has a mortgaged property," she wrote. "On the other hand, I feel really mean for judging him, but I have visions of 'mummy's boy' in my head and I really don't want to deal with that."

Her confessional post proved divisive to say the least.

While some Mumsnet users like ComedyCook urged the woman to "look past it" and give him a chance, others like Arabella were "wary" of his claims, especially as many small businesses received financial support during the pandemic.

Poptart4 commented: "I think you're overthinking this, you haven't even been on a date yet. I think it's worth giving him a chance."

AHungryCaterpillar disagreed though, writing: "it would put me off, I've lived alone since 16 so I wouldn't really want to date someone who still lived at home with their mom."

Blodbav said the woman "shouldn't judge without knowing" his situation, adding that "living with mum does not equal mummy's boy. A mummy's boy will be one regardless of where he sleeps at night."

Aniita, meanwhile, urged her to go on a date but confront the man over his circumstances. "I'd still go on the date, but be wanting to know how long he has lived with his mum and what his plan for getting out is," they said.

Returning to the thread, the woman who posted the original message tried to explain her thinking. "I just don't think I want to date someone who hasn't got their priorities sorted in life and is too comfortable being with mummy," she said.

Newsweek has contacted the original poster for comment.

A woman on a dating app.
Stock image of a dating app - a woman who expressed reservations about dating a man in his 40s who lives with his mom has drawn a mixed response online. Diy13/Getty