Couple Slammed For Criticizing New Mom and Claiming Childcare Is 'Easy'

A husband and wife who told a woman struggling with postpartum depression she needed to be a "good mom" and claimed "taking care of a baby is easy" have drawn a furious reaction online.

The first few months of parenthood can be difficult for moms and dads but it is especially hard for new mothers with childbirth not only taking a physical toll but a mental one too.

According to a 2020 CDC Study, around 1 in 8 women experience symptoms of maternal depression. That's why it's crucial to not only receive support from physicians but also friends and family.

Most would understand and appreciate this, but as the story shared to Reddit by one first time dad posting as throwra_firsttimedad shows, there are occasional exceptions.

Writing in the post, which has earned over 7,400 upvotes along with over 10,000 upvotes in the comments, the 30-year-old dad opened up about how things have been going since his wife, 30, gave birth 4 months ago.

"My wife has been suffering from PPD (postpartum depression) and she's had a lot of breakdowns," he admitted, adding that it's been "heartbreaking to see."

Eager to help her, he booked some time off work and gave her his banker's card, telling her to go and have "a day to herself" while he looked after their newborn.

While she was out, his older brother and his wife came over to see the baby but almost immediately appeared confused asking "where she [the mom] was" and why he had been "babysitting" the child.

"I told them it wasn't babysitting when it's my own child and I was giving my wife some time to herself," the new dad explained. According to the post, his sister-in-law "scoffed" at this explanation and told him "she should be home like a good mom." His brother then agreed, adding that he thought "taking care of a baby is easy."

The new dad took offense and fired back at his brother: "of course it'd be easy for you, because you live with mom so you could just dump the baby on her." An argument ensued with the dad eventually kicking both of them out of his house and telling them to "never come back unless they apologized."

He later got a call from his mom who told him that while she "agreed" with him on the matter, she felt he had been "a bit harsh" in what he said to his brother. But while his mom appeared on the fence over the issue, the response was markedly different on social media where users were quick to slam the brother and his wife over what many felt were callous comments.

Primary-Criticism929 said the brother and his wife crossed a line "the moment they said the word babysitting" in relation to a dad looking after his child. Another user, Beamis elaborated further writing: "I always find it telling, sad and funny that the people who consider taking care of your own children to be babysitting so often turn out to be the ones who don't actually parent their own kids."

Salymander_1 branded their remarks "sexist and offensive" to both the mom and dad. "It is perfectly appropriate for a mother to go out without her baby if someone trusted is caring for the child," they wrote. "You know, like the baby's other parent?"

AllButACrazyCatLady commented: "Everything that came out of those people's mouths was appalling" adding, "please tell your wife that lots of people are wishing her well...She clearly has love and support at home so I have faith things will get better."

Serious-Currency108 also praised the man posting his story to Reddit as an "awesome dad and husband" while slamming his sibling and his wife for their "unsolicited advice." "Part of being a good mom is being in the right headspace," they added. "You were allowing your wife to do just that."

Newsweek has contacted throwra_firsttimedad for comment.

If you have a similar family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

A woman with post natal depression.
Stock image of a woman with a baby - a mom with postpartum depression drew criticism from her brother-in-law and his wife. Koldunova_Anna/Getty